Week 11 :: of boys, fairies and the natural order

My ten-year-old son still believes in Santa.

And the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy and leprechauns.  I would like to blame it on that recent animated film, but the truth of the matter is that he’d believed before and he continues to believe after; the movie just reinforced his faith.

Some would say, good on you!  You’ve preserved his innocence long after it’s expiration date.  Where other ten year olds are spouting language that would make a sailor cringe, your son still thinks “stupid” is a bad word.  Yay, you, for being an awesome mom!

The thing of it is, he’s only one more year away from that hell known as middle school.  And as a mom and former middle school survivor, I fear for his psychological and physical safety.  Won’t he get teased?  Taunted? Swirlied in the boys’ bathroom?  Worse than the thought of a couple of bumps and bruises – boys heal – is the idea that my very trusting, very vulnerable boy will be forever scarred once this inevitable awakening occurs.

Lace Friday

So I try to hint that these mythical creatures may be just that – pretty stories with no basis in reality. I have an ulterior motive for doing this beyond my mommy fear of a tormented child: it’s exhausting being all these mythical creatures.  Because at the end of the day, it’s not Daddy that has to wait till the kids are asleep to write the notes from Santa/Tooth Fairy/Easter Bunny, is it?  It’s not Daddy that has to hide the special paper or delete the special fonts that were used.  Nosirree!  It’s Mommy.  And Mommy is tired.

But sometimes, something happens that restores your own faith and makes you realize that life’s too short to spend worrying.

lace friday

Earlier this year, my family attended a birthday party where the theme was fairies.  Stood to reason, the birthday girl was turning five.  Thankfully, the mother of said child provided fun boy games for the older males.  She had them make PVC pipe marshmallow shooters while the little girls were given beautiful stone pots and various flora to put in said pots and create fairy gardens.

All went well until the ride home when Dylan, who I thought had been perfectly satisfied with his toy gun, murmurs: “Mommy, I want a fairy garden.”  I think he means he wants to build a house for Aly’s fairy garden because that’s normal, right?  Boys build.  He couldn’t possibly be hinting that he believed in fairies too?  The Tooth Fairy, sure, because that’s an established childhood legend.  But regular fairies?  Like Tinkerbell?  That’s just a bit too girly, right?  I tell him we’d work on it some time during the week and I forget all about it.

lace friday

The following day, Dylan comes running up to me, thoroughly breathless with excitement: “Mom!  Mom!  Guess what?  The fairies came!”

What?!

“I put those stones in front of Aly’s fairy house.  I remember they were like this.  But now, they’re like this!” he pantomimes as I look on with slack-jawed disbelief.  “And I put a sign up that said Fairy Lives Here and that moved too!  The fairies came!”

And he was so beside himself that even the eye roll that was threatening to take over my face withered under his enthusiasm.  He ran off and I shook my head, bemused, thinking to have a discussion with Hubby about appropriate ten-year-old boy behaviour when Aly comes sidling up to me.  It’s her turn to whisper:

“Mommy, I moved those rocks and the sign.”

“What?!”

“I moved them because I want Dylan to keep believing in magic.  Other kids say there’s no such thing as magic, but there is.  Right, Mommy?”

When even my own daughter foils my attempts at gentle disillusionment, then I have to take this as a sign that the universe is telling me to throw my hands up in the air and just let the natural order of things take its course.

lace friday

:: Just the facts, ma’am ::
Top – F21
Jeans – Mossimo @ Target
Flats – Old Navy
Bracelet – Old Navy
Earrings – handmade by moi

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11 thoughts on “Week 11 :: of boys, fairies and the natural order

  1. So I know this is a fashion blog but I LOVE todays post! It lets your storytelling shine. This story is so tender and sweet. I thought that was how you looked today, too so it matched the theme of the story. Since I met you on a writing blog you know this is what I find most interesting. I think you use fashion as your pallet to illustrate your stories which I think is creative and innovative. Crazy week but will email back soon. 🙂

  2. I love your outfit today and your kids are too cute 🙂 I like the shirt untucked – It didn’t even cross my mind that you look preggers in this pic, nope nope nope…Have a great weekend!

    • Hahaha! Thanks for the input, Elba. I was actually gonna use this outfit as an example of styling snafus but I’m glad you like it. Happy weekend to you too!

  3. I admit, I was a little confused as to what you were doing here until I read the comments. However, I just thought you were feeling a bit uninspired today with the outfit and just decided to write about something that (to me) is a litlte more interesting.

    I really liked hearing about Dylan and his belife in mythical creatures. There are far, far, far worse things to belive in at 10/11. Time and age will rain enough on his beliefs that you don’t have to worry about doing it right now. This last year was the “big talk” about childhood mythical creaturesfor us. My son was starting to ask all the right questions and Kadir felt it was time to pull the curtain back and show him the wizard. It was a bit heartbreaking for me, to be honest. It meant that I had to come to grips with a child that was no longer so small and innocent as he had been just a year or so ago.

    There was just one thing that kind of stuck out here to me. Just what is “appropriate boy behavior”? A man who likes to garden, or create cute fairy cottages, or fanciful baubles isn’t manly? I’d say a man’s hobbies don’t always define his masculinity. For example, my Grandpa J was fond of birdhouses and wasn’t above creating Bavarian style hotels with pink and baby blue trim with “girlie” lawn furniture from time to time. He enjoyed creating something beautiful, even if it was just for the birds.

    • Was trying to get this post out on time in the midst of a minor cluster-eff at work. Pardon the misunderstood implication. I meant to say “appropriate ten-year-old boy behavior” so I wanted to question the age more than the gender.

    • Well, I’m actually trying this thing that Lisa over at Respect the Shoes is doing (I talked about this yesterday) where she actually doesn’t talk about the outfits but about her life in general. Why? Do you not like it? I suppose I could go back to writing about fashion, but sometimes there really isn’t much to say about the outfit that the pictures don’t say themselves.

      And today was a particularly blah day. I shoulda tucked the shirt in so I didn’t look pregnant. :/

      • It’s fine untucked. I like the outfit.

        It’s up to you…it’s your blog but if I was a new reader, I’d be a little confused since it’s a fashion blog but you’re not talking about fashion or your outfits.

  4. This was a lovely essay…perfect for Expressing Motherhood. C’mon…peer pressure…do it! Do it! Anyhow, I figured out your problem. You actually erase your special font afterward. OMG! You really make things hard! But yes, it is always the mommies who do all the hard work on this. Still think you deserve a back pat for writing such convincing letters. I still think that would be a great small business for us, by the way ; )

    • Yes, I’ve erased the font before. But then I forget which I used and then the kids notice that Santa used a different font so it’s all suspicious. Blargh.

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